А что люди пытаются сделать с эльфами, это что-то. Палками приходится отгонять супостатов. Хотя один принёс неплохую мысль, но без нормального персонажа... Теперь вот пытаюсь представить себе, что было бы в реальности... И тихонько потешаюсь со своего применения "в реальности" к эльфам и экстрапланарным бесконечным библиотекам.

Я идиот, вот что...

@темы: поводительное

---

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggy," while looking for a big rock...

Это я в тему об эльфах.

@темы: смешное

---

Кошаки

Ваше имя Получаем кошаков!

все гадания на aeterna.ru

@темы: картинки, флешмобное

---

Спёрли мобильник. Подробности позже О.о

---

What this shit is ideal for is game soundtracks. Major drama mode.

Boomp3.com

---

10.11.2008 в 13:05

Пишет  Маленький товарищ Микки-Маузер:

Jesus Crisis

@темы: свинорыбство

---

А один знакомый мастер (мы не будем показывать пальцем) всё-таки испортил мне эльфов, которые для меня теперь не эльфы без двулезвийников и ушастых грифонов.


А ещё не обошлось без неприступных горных цитаделей и городов, построенных вокруг стволов вековых деревьев... Практически все эльфийские стереотипы во плоти, да ещё несколько супер-драматичных легенд и мега-сильных неписей, про которых разве что эпическое фентези писать, а на партию насылать неприлично... Ощущаю себя птицей какаду. Не знаю, почему именно какаду - но именно ей.


Кстати, о фентези - я прочитала первую фентезю за... года 2-3, наверное. Называется "Дракон Её Величества". Советую.

@темы: мозг, поводительное

---

А ещё как мне неприятно когда кто-нибудь выскакивает и начинает насаждать рациональность, логичность и житейскую мудрость на людей, у которых проблемы вне компетенции разума и вне зоны охвата житейской мудрости... Рррр. Ужасно неприятно.

Сам стараюсь не грешить этим, но тоже ведь делаю наверняка... От этого ещё неприятнее.

@темы: my brave malenky self, злое

---

I'm not antisocial. I just can't stand people.

@темы: свинорыбство

---

Ещё об эльфах

Personality: The personality of an elf can be most accurately described as a contained force of nature. All the emotions run true and deep in elves' hearts, sometimes far stronger than their human counterparts, but their strict traditions make them reserved. They usually focus their dangerously slow passion on being the best at what they do. It is not the petty competitiveness that exists among short-lived races though. Elves do not compete with each other – they choose their own path and make it the work of their life to excel in their chosen field. Elves have an extremely strong sense of honor, but their definition of honorable are different from that of humans. The main conflict in an elf's personality is between his individualism and his sense of community, and the latter rarely loses.

Read more

Physical Description: Every elf is different from another and every clan has specific physical traits that single them out between their peers, but there are some common traits all elves share. They are on average taller than humans and proportionally built. You will never see an extremely thin or extremely fat elf unless some horrific circumstances are involved, but they all vary in muscle mass. Elves have no facial or body hair and usually smell different from all other races. They live from 400 to 3000 years and some are told to be immortal. Despite their age they never look older than early 30s by human standards. Elves have a strong connection to nature which makes them more perceptive and intuitive and also makes their bodies more resilient. They require sleep just as all other races do but their inborn endurance can help them maintain their strength even if they are deprived of sleep. Food that elves consume should be pure - they cannot stomach anything even remotely spoiled. The food simply doesn't go down and even if it does it goes up in a matter of minutes.
All elves traditionally wear their hair long and style it elaborately, adorning with jewelery and ribbons. By contrast, their clothing is usually functional and uncomplicated in design, although the fabric and embrodiery used is of exceptional quality.

Relations: Elves are wary of any other races and always distance themselves. Their diplomatic relations with dwarves are slightly warmer than those with humans or any other sentient races but all in all they are distant and withdrawn. Their strict traditions and laws make them hard to understand for humans especially, and while they maintain diplomatic relations a certain degree of distrust exists on both sides. Male elves are also known to leave progeny whenever they go and while half-elves are usually accepted among humans elves do not consider them their offspring.

Elven Lands: Most elves live in Kalaeri Empire. It is the biggest country on the continent, spanning across many climate zones, and a lot of it is still untamed. The country is not friendly to strangers, only a handful border cities being open to non-elves and any diplomatic missions are closely watched.
Elves frequent mountain cities of dwarves but rarely stray into the deep caverns of their mines feeling trapped there. In human lands they tend to live individualistic lives, only gathering in communities on rare occasions. Any Kalaeri elf traveling the world regards a native elf with a certain degree of contempt.

Religion: Elves don't have gods or temples, leaning more towards philosophy than religion. Their beliefs are centered around adhering to the natural order of things and both bettering themselves and society.

Names: A full name of any elf is incredibly long and complicated but it is rarely used. A new-born elf has at least two names: the name they are given at birth and their clan's name. If an elf comes from a ruling family of the clan he takes on a prefix "ni" to his clan name. If he belongs to one of the lesser families he also has him family name. When an elf starts apprenticeship in a profession he takes on the name of the profession as well, preceded by a prefix "ka" when he completes his training. If elf manifests supernatural talents, like a dragon lineage, planar lineage or a gift of sorcery, he takes on a name of that gift as well.
An elf who takes a wife also adds her family name to his unless she is of the clan's ruling family. In that case he joins her family and replaces his family name with hers, preceded by a prefix "ren". A mother of a prominent elf also adds her child's name to hers preceeded by the prefix "lon"

Marriage, fidelity and love: Love is not a required for an elf to start a family. Majority of marriages, even between commoners, are arranged according to economical, political or social convinience. Both love and sex can be enjoyed outside of marriage as long as the union doesn’t produce children, and society doesn’t frown upon even the most outrageous (by human standards) displays of extramarital relationships.
For a woman bearing child outside of the wedlock is not dishonorable and even increases her chances of getting married later; such children are raised alongside the relatives of the mother and even if the father is known he has no claim on the child.

Fjarren: For the most part elves do not mine the gems in their mountains or plow their fields by themselves. An elf’s life is too valuable for him to vaste it with a pick or a shovel and only most unfortunate or strange prefer to make such mindless tasks their way of life. After all, elves have fjarren to do the dirty work for them.
Fjarren are a race of slaves bred thousands of years ago to assist elves in mundane tasks. The legend says fjarren are elemental spirits bound to flesh. They are much shorter than elves, with darker skin, exotic features and strange hair colors. Their life is awfully short by elven standarts – just a little over hundred years – and they are usually allowed to breed freely to sustain the Empire’s need for raw manpower.

Slavery: Slavery in the Empire is a pretty mundane thing and it is viewed like a neccessity. Aside from fjarren, who are born slaves and are rarely freed, elves can become slaves, usually for their crimes, debts, or exertion of some of the obscure traditions that designate slavery as punishment for going against traditions. All slaves, fjarren and elves, are treated the same – as useful tools. Depending on a slave’s skills he can be a prized posession or an expendable resourse, but treating your slaves poorly is considered dishonorable and low.

Lesser dragons: Elves have an exceptional bond with true dragons, but those magnifiscent beasts tend to live in seclusion and rarely show themselves even to their favorites. That affinity, however, lets elves breed lesser dragons for various purposes. There are a lot of breeds, with every clan closely guarding their secrets and traditions of rearing and training dragons. Dragon handlers are a priveleged cast of elven society; they are trained from early childhood and fully devote their lives to one specific dragon.

@темы: поводительное

---

У меня новый аватар
<------------

@темы: свинорыбство

---

Synchronized panicking is not a proper battle plan.

Plan B is not automatically twice as much gunpowder as Plan A.

How to serve Dragons is not a cookbook.

When surrendering I am to hand the sword over HILT first.

Polka is not appropriate marching music.

There is no Summon Bimbo spell.

Bring him back intact includes redundant organs.

When accepting a challenge for a duel, I must allow the other guy time to find a pistol.

My swashbuckling fop cannot take the flaw Dark Secret: Not Gay

I do not have weapon profiency in cat.

Dwarves do not count as burrowing animals.

Not allowed to give a 4 year old a sugar rush just to jack up the CR later.


Not allowed to try and make a dire version of any dog of the toy breeds.

I cannot use my time machine to hire Hitler a hooker in 1920, thus avoiding WW2.

I am not allowed to do anything that would make a Sith Lord cry.

There is no Halfling god of groin shots.

---

That's the crack-team that foils my every plan? I'm deeply shamed.

@темы: цитаты, грустное

---

That's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.

@темы: цитаты, объявления

---

Я ботанег. Я пишу эльфов

A full name of any elf is long and complicated but it is rarely used. A new-born elf has at least two names: the name they are given at birth and their clan's name. If an elf comes from a ruling family of the clan he takes on a prefix "ni" to his clan name. If he belongs to one of the lesser families he also has his family name. When an elf starts apprenticeship in a profession he takes on the name of the profession as well, preceded by a prefix "ka" when he completes his training. If an elf manifests supernatural talents, like a dragon lineage, planar lineage or a gift of sorcery, he takes on a name of that gift as well.
An elf who takes a wife also adds her family name to his unless she is of the clan's ruling family. In that case he joins her family and replaces his family name with hers, preceded by a prefix "ren". A mother of a prominent elf also adds her child's name to hers preceeded by the prefix "lon".


Хотя до Толкина мне, конечно, далеко. И слава богу...

@темы: размышлятельное, поводительное

---

О да.

Boomp3.com

medicated drama queen...

Help me if you can,
It's just that this...
Is not the way I'm wired,
So could you please,
Help me understand why,
You've given in to woe these reckless dark desires

You're
Lying to yourself again,
Suicidal imbecile,
Think about it,
Pound it on a fault line,
What will it take to get it through to you, precious?
I’m over this
Why do you wanna throw it away like this,
Such a mess,
Why would I wanna watch you...


Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now?
Everyone will have his day to die

Medicated drama queen,
Picture perfect numb belligerence,
Narcissistic drama queen,
Craving fame and all its decadence

Lying through your teeth again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, pound it on a fault line,
What will it take to get it through to you precious?
I'm over this, why do you want to throw it away like this?
Such a mess, Why would I wanna watch you...

Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet at a time,
What's your rush now?
Everyone will
Have
His
Day
To
Die

They were right about you
They were right about you

Lying to my face again,
Suicidal imbecile,
Think about it, you're pounding on a fault line,
What will it take to get through to you precious?
I’m over this
Why do you want to throw it away like this?

Such a mess,
I'm over this
Over this!

Disconnect
And self destruct,
One
Bullet
At a time
What's
Your
Hurry,
Everyone will
Have
His
Day
To
Die
If you choose to pull the trigger,
Should your drama prove sincere,
Do it somewhere
Far away from here

@темы: песенки, злое

---

Жена

Жена прекрасна, и у меня даже есть пара фоток в доказательство... Но сука фотошоп ест опять цвета, даже в пнг. Надо заиметь себе лайтрум, но мне лень... Так что пока - одна сепия. То есть реально одна. Фокус почему-то на куртке вместо жены, но мне нравится...

@темы: картинки, красивое

---

Еретики - горючее прогресса. Господь, благослови еретиков!

Boomp3.com

God is all-knowing
And God is all-seeing
Just who do you think that you are to change His mind?

He already knows what you want
And decided that you didn't need it

So don't bother asking for cures or an answer -
God is the one who gave you the cancer.

@музыка: Dengobai is near... Tatuin is far... Near... Far...

---

ЫЫЫЫЫЫ

If violence wasn’t your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it.

Mockery and derision have their place. Usually, it's on the far side of the airlock.

A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head.

Do unto others.

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.

That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.

There is no 'overkill.' There is only 'open fire' and 'time to reload.'



www.schlockmercenary.com/

@темы: смешное

---

Try again, fail again, fail better. - Samuel Beckett
Try not. Do or do not. - Yoda

@темы: смешное