[elian]

Я посмотрела Firefly. Мэл Рейнольдс - мой герой... И Джейн, конечно. И психопатка Ривер. Ривер прекрасна. И вообще.
Джосс Ведон, конечно, героее всех. Он таки пишет шикарные диалоги

Also? I can kill you with my brain

Mal: If anyone gets nosy, just...you know... shoot 'em.
Zoe: Shoot 'em?
Mal: Politely.

Jayne: Captain, can you stop her from bein' cheerful, please?
Mal: I don't believe there's a power in the 'verse can stop Kaylee from being cheerful.

Zoe: I know something ain't right.
Wash: Sweetie, we're crooks. If everything were right, we'd be in jail.

Zoe: That ain't fair.
Badger: Crime and politics, little girl. Situation is always...fluid.
Jayne: Only fluid I see here is the puddle of piss refusing to pay us our wage!

Inara: So. Would you like to lecture me the wickedness of my ways?
Book: I brought you some supper, but.… if you'd prefer a lecture, I've a few very catchy ones prepared. Sin, and hellfire… one has lepers.

Simon: What happens if they board us?
Zoe: If they take the ship, they'll rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we're very, very lucky, they'll do it in that order.

Simon: I'm trying to put this as delicately as I can...how do I know you won't kill me in my sleep?

Mal: I know they tell ya, you never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is, on occasion, hilarious.

Zoe: Sir? I think you have a problem with your brain being missing.

Jayne: You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with 'til you understand who's in ruttin' command here!

Zoe: Planet's coming up a mite fast.
Wash: That's just 'cause- I'm going down too quick. Likely crash and kill us all.
[As the ship begins to shake, Mal calmly leaves.]
Mal: Well, that happens, let me know.

Harrow: I know him. And I think he's a psychotic lowlife.
Mal: And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community."

Mal: So, she's added cussing and hurling about of things to her repertoire. She really is a prodigy.
Simon: It's just a bad day.
Mal: No, a bad day is when someone's yellin' spooks the cattle. Understand? You ever see cattle stampede when they got no place to run? It's kind of like a...a meat grinder. And it'll lose us half the herd.
Simon: She hasn't gone anywhere near the cattle.
Mal: No, but in case you hadn't noticed, her voice kinda carries. We're two miles above ground and they can probably hear her down there. Soon as we unload, she can holler until our ears bleed. (to River) Although I would take it as a kindness if she didn't.
River: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems.
Mal: (to Simon) See, morbid and creepifying, I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like.

Zoe: Knew a man once who had a hole clean through his whole shoulder. Used to keep a spare hankie in there."

Mal: Gotta say, doctor, your talent for alienatin' folk is near miraculous.
Simon: Yes, I'm very proud.

Simon: So finally...a decent wound on this ship, and I miss out. I'm sorry.
Mal: Well, you were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.

Book: If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.

Mal: Which one do you figured tracked us?
Zoe: The ugly one, sir.
Mal: Could you be more specific?

Mal: Looks can be deceiving.
Jayne: Not as deceiving as a lowdown, dirty... deceiver.
Mal: Well said. Wasn't that well said, Zoe?
Zoe: Had a kind of poetry to it, sir.

Kaylee: Hey there, Inara! How was your checkup?
Inara: Same as last year. What's going on?
Kaylee: (cheerfully) Oh well let's see...we killed Simon and River, stole a bunch of medicine, and the Cap'n and Zoe are springin' the others got snatched by the feds.

Book: Yes, I'd forgotten you're moonlighting as a criminal mastermind now. Got your next heist planned?
Simon: No. But I'm thinking about growing a big black mustache. I'm a traditionalist.

Mal: Ah, the pitter patter of tiny feet in huge combat boots.

Zoe: Preacher, don't the Bible have some pretty specific things to say about killing?
Book: Quite specific. It is, however,somewhat fuzzier on the subject of kneecaps.

River: Also? I can kill you with my brain.

Mal: Oh! That was bracing. They don't like it when you shoot at them. I worked that out myself.

Inara: It sounds like the sort of thing this crew can handle. I can't guarantee they'll handle it particularly well, but-
Nandi: If they got guns, and brains at all...
Inara: They have guns.

Kaylee: Everybody's got somebody... (wistfully) Wash, tell me I'm pretty...
Wash: Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion.
Kaylee: 'Cause I'm pretty?
Wash: 'Cause you're pretty.
Kaylee: Thank you. That was very restorative.

Wash: Yeah well, if she doesn't give us some extra flow from the engine room to offset the burn through, this landing is gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define interesting.
Wash: Oh god oh god we're all gonna die?

Mal: Fear's nothin' to be ashamed of, doctor.
Simon: This isn't fear. This is anger.
Mal: Well. Kinda hard to tell one from t'other, face like yours.
Simon: Well I imagine if it were fear, my eyes would be wider.
Mal: Hmm. I'll keep a look out for that next time.

Mal: (ship shakes violently) Kaylee, what in the spincter o' hell you playing at?

Jayne: Shepherd Book used to tell me, 'Can't do somethin' smart, do somethin' right'.

Operative: Do you know what your sin is?
Mal: Aw hell. I'm a fan of all seven.

Mal: (pulling himself up after being shot) Shot me in the back! Haven't made you angry, have I?

Zoe: Cap'n'll come up with a plan.
Kaylee: Well, that's good. Right?
Zoe: Possible you're not recalling some of his previous plans.

Zoe: You sanguine about the kind of reception we're apt to receive on an Alliance ship, Cap'n?
Mal: Absolutely. [pauses] What's "sanguine" mean?
Zoe: "Sanguine". Hopeful. Plus, point of interest: it also means "bloody".
Mal: Well, that pretty much covers all the options, don't it?

Jayne: Well… I don't like the idea of someone hearin' what I'm thinkin'.
Inara: No one likes the idea of hearing what you're thinking.

Early: Where'd she go?
Simon: I can't keep track of her when she's not incorporeally possessing a spaceship — don't look at me.

Mal: You know, you're not quite right.
River: [smiles] That's the popular theory.